Well, Lovecraft's "Dreams in a Witch House" highlights most of my experiences with schizophrenia... and they called it a failure. puff...

 Only ruins understand me! Lovecraft keeps the blood in my veins. 

Now I know why he's my favorite author.

He was schizophrenic.  

How many movies would work if the characters didn't do incredibly stupid things?...

Yes, let's go into an uncharted nebula because some babe with a funny head says she needs help, as her ship was wrecked there. She's not part of Starfleet.  He's never seen her species before either, a random alien from the universe.  

So sad.

Let's do it, the captain said.  

What a buddy.

Looney Tunes.

I woke Up and Fell Asleep

 I managed to get to the library for a few hours. I mostly read an old YA novel called Children of the Sun by Barabra Wood.  I can't relate as well, no more princes, but I enjoy her attention of the subject and how she writes.  It's like visiting an old friend. 

It made me laugh at the part where the main character tells the soldiers she is there to be with a ruling Lord to soothe his heart. I'm sure they laughed and made a prostitution joke, but the joke is opaque in the novel.  I got one, too. I guess even they had problems with that happening to young virgins and maidens who lose their heads, an "either/or" action.  Do you accept your little gift, Durov?  Durov is always down, and he'll impregnate them.  I'm a fan.  

Back here... Damn extremists. Cock blockers.  

Let it be purity--causes sickness, the measure of a man, the worth of a woman.

I played with a butterfly, a beautiful orange and black one or a strange leaf. Nature wears the best costumes.  After a few seconds, he flew off, never will we meet again, but we shared a moment.

Need to Wash My Shoes, the Rip-Off Pair

 I purchased a pair of shoes around Christmas. They were supposed to be machine washable, but they look horrible, and the woman in the bank asked me if I have another pair because her sister gave her a bunch. Not interested. I do. These are comfortable and if I think it's going to rain, they go on because they already show their sins. They do freshen up, but that is all. They do not wash off in the washing machine, they get dirty easily, and overall, have not aged well.

Like my face.

But I had fun outside.

I best not move to South Korea.   

I Went Into the Kitchen...

 I watched a program about models early today.  The woman at around 700 calories a day, and she was tall with blonde hair, naturally, blonde hair. She worked out to get killer abs but was weak, and this confused me.  Beauty is sometimes a curse.  I equate models as a sport due to all it takes.  

Well, I am fat. I got into trouble for going over the counter.  I was not blamed for a mishap today as I was gone learning about Virgil.  I'm just known to do it at night.  I decided to eat a bigger dinner so that there would be no need to snack.  I've lost control in this realm of life: my weight and appearance.  I don't have the social pressure I used to.

Belly doesn't look so good.

They say nothing tastes as good as skinny feels, but this woman on TV enjoyed spending a day eating like a body builder, and he ate like her and far from satisfied. In the end, she consumed more calories than usual and perked up.  I hope she didn't puke.

And what an afterlife? Models don't make tons of money.  When they time out, there's no work for them. What do you become after a supermodel?  An old face to hate? A mother who pushed you too far? Guys who didn't love you after 30?   

I like potato chips with sour cream.  I like to sit on the couch, gross but comfy, and watch the "Carol Brunette Show."  Most TV sucks these days.  

And get off my lawn :P

Blame Game, All Suckers

 

Lindsay Lohan wonders why no one 'protected' her more during her early rise to fame

We all wonder. My parents let us run wild and had issues of her own.  I came back from a severe trauma situation, and my mom didn't know what to do.  I was super thin, so she fed me more that time. My dad dumped me but kept custody, but she didn't fight much then because she finally got me out of there, but with a punch in the gut. She had a difficult time with herself, and I've always felt like suppressed guilt, not that it can surface.  My mom should have called the cops more and had me taken away.  I did a lot for her. I took care of the kids all the time, worked for her alcohol, and I didn't get to be a teenager. Plus, I'm special needs, so I was picked on for that by my parents who are smart, but mom is seriously just a couch genius watching BBC. She said I would be a bag lady or work a manage shift at fast food if that.  Kaela is so dumb, not like my others. Thanks. Well, that's better than being overly praised like my dad does and makes me sick in the head. It's like, you're full of shit.  My parents constantly punished me, and I really didn't understand it.  I wrote my infamous letters asking why.  Children don't analyze their own behavior that well, and you can't punish kids constantly when they have a mental illness. It escalated the situation with my sister who keeps her distance. I've always been a little away from them because of my dad and his "friends." The family blamed my parents and punished them.  I just grew up being punished. I like pain, right?  I showed my teeth.  Then the door was locked.  Sometimes, my sister would let me in. I loved my siblings more than anything. I was thrown out at 17, and I was not ready.  They should have given me to Grandma Creighton who was an elementary teacher, but we have the nefarious alcohol that I was also confused about--and trusting me enough to be convenient.  We can blame everyone and the devil, but it still happened.  

Sometimes, I'm not as clear as I would like

In my last post, I was referring to the frustration of Musk and his products and how he is so sensitive and like, we're coming for you.  The psychotronic warfare has been a nightmare for me. I'm not too fond of the new gods or angels.  They never ask is if it's okay.  

Don't rely on me, I suppose, listen to the music.

They will try to run away from my text, declaring me an idiot, yes, and especially now.  However, their little gangs are less than to be desired.  They have done these things sneakily.  I'm not looking forward to one world government, as that's impossible, and being dragged off for crushes on guys or whatever else. How many mistresses has Musk had?  Yet they're killing the less than desired people in his mind.

They have nothing left.  Good luck getting rid of OnlyFans.  We all know he's a racist scumbag anyway, kill the helpless. 

Or make them pedophiles and worse.  

Kind of like how I'm a parasite.  I've said they can fix things if they wish. Right now, the usuals are being taken and then out on the street dazed and confused.

"Machines of Our Disgrace," by Celldweller. We're all supposed to capitulate to their force, though they claim to be helping to uplift the world.  Oh no...

Ask Blue Stahli what he's doing.  I have dealt with him, not Musk. Enjoy Blue Stahli's torture rooms and turning your family into mushy peaches. I don't like you either. That's how they're really going to be.