It's the Same Day Again

 When will it be tomorrow? Should I bother to make plans, or will it be that same day again?  

Okay, Miss Sulky, you've been invited to lunch with your grandma and aunt. Grandma has Alzheimer's. She still knows, and she lives at home with grandpa who cares dearly for her. I'm thankful.  He takes her out to get her hair done, her nails done.  My aunt takes her to lunch.  On Sundays, grandpa and she ride in their little convertible if it's nice outside.

Sometimes, she gets this zombie look on her face.  Words can't describe it, especially her eyes.  People are afraid of her expression or lack thereof, part ghost and beyond this world.

She walks between here and there, but she comes back with funny memories.  She will act childish and try to trick us at times.

She's forgotten she can paint.  

It's a slow goodbye.  

We can't hold back a soul forever.

I've been struggling lately

 I enjoyed the air outside, scents of autumn. Summer was way too vain this year, and so I welcome the cooler weather and bringing out my fuzzy sweaters and jackets.  

I miss my granny's ability to dress me in a way that looks good. She has great taste but is crazy. I suspect she might be dead by now. She was like 80-something last time we talked.  We were separated. I warned her that she should have not moved in with him.  

Imagine when there were the three of us together. 

She's probably a ward of the state if she is alive.  I did call senior services, but California is notorious for being lax about helping people. 

They still have Thrift Shops out there.

I find some good outfits there, even without granny. I think of her sometimes. She runs away in the middle of traffic or in a park.  Then we used to have to look for her for hours.  Stil, savvy style and exquisite cooked dishes. 

I received one hundred dollars for clothing expenses.  I go to the thrift store to purchase items.  I have some money left, and I would like to buy a nice dress for Christmas from what remains.  I purchased a shirt and skirt for Thanksgiving.  

My Aunt moved back, as I think I've said, which is the best news since the T-Rex became my emotional support animal. 

 

  

Peppermint Tea

Today, I didn't do much.  

I'm still fighting not having any motivation and am restless.  I've been struggling with time lately.  Five hours will pass, and I have filled them with nothing.  I'm up at the wrong times.

I did purchase tea today.  When I was younger, I used to go to little tea shops.

 We had Bible Study end at a medium-sized tea house two years ago.  I don't usually like raspberry tea, but the mix they did tasted, well, good.  

Treats are good, not too many. Tell my cat that.  I'm concerned I may wake up with a knife across my neck for more treats.

If you eat too much cake, humans, you will turn into sugar and melt, and you will meet Pennywise in the sewer.  I hear he's not a good roommate.  A mad hatter!  

He tries to sell children drugs to make ends meet.  And they tell everyone there's some clown that gets them high, and now they're seeing some weird shit.

What is a clown to do?  The circus isn't what it used to be, no cracking whips or popping corn anymore.  

To have to live in a sewer!  The feds are getting suspicious. Why are kids meeting a strange clown in a sewer?  He reasons life is like a sick, sad, joke; life and its comforts.

I like Peppermint tea.  

I like five but not six and seven but not eight and ten is okay, but we don't talk about three

I Went Shopping with my Caring Aunt

 I received my clothing allowance.  

 I shopped at Good Will. 

Who would buy their underwear at a secondhand shop?  

Girls can wear bikinis when mudwrestling, not that it matters.  I can't.  Too much skin, and the clock keeps on clapping.  

I've never fit in anyway.  Busted. A waste.

A woman wore this shirt, not just me.  I'll never know the person who abandoned the clothing.  Skin or boredom?  

Will I ever abandon it?  I hope it's not too much skin but freedom like for the other woman.   

It's a deal!

A nice smile

 A volunteer came by and painted our nails. 

Mine are a blue sparkly hue now, a little of it peeled off, not the fancy polish some women get especially for their boyfriends and husbands -- and you wonder why a guy doesn't mind a girls' night out with a manicure on the schedule.

He might even pay for it.  

I enjoyed seeing the older women enjoy themselves. to feel beautiful again and cared for.  

It's the little things in life.

I am clean

 My mind doesn't understand time like it used to. I finally decided to shower because I needed to shave both the pits and the legs.  I was in public today in a t-shirt dress cut to my knees.  No one really noticed. I don't catch eyes.

They mostly turn away.

I walked up to the sushi place, which I haven't done in a while. I worked up sweat, especially up the hill.  Once again, I didn't call our order in, so I had to wait a long time, but the food was worth it.  I haven't had sushi in a while, real sushi that is.

They were a bit cheap on the salmon.  They make a lot of money.  Really?

The more the merrier, everyone knows.

I don't know why the restaurant doesn't expand its location.  I guess it wants to stay a carry out business.  It has two tables and a bar to eat at, but most people pick up orders.  

Grub hug came for everyone's dinner.  That's a waste to me, grub hug, but it's lucrative enough that it's a common second job these days, that and uber.  

Drones will be used soon enough, I believe.  We'll need licenses to own and operate them.  

Well, the air is laced with fall. It's the intellectual season. Spring and fall are my favorite seasons. 

I'm happy, a nice rest, clean and fed with my cat next to me. 

It's been a good day, not productive, but good.