Thursday, May 23, 2019

Dear Chat Show

That is one way to battle him.  It's hard to get away from his simpleton morals and viewpoints that relate to the lower, less educated classes and youth/inexperience. Comedy reaches them. He is an incredibly good actor, but he's getting ugly. Bonus.  You have to get his villagers back. it's annoying. I used to play "Age of Empires," and I didn't slaughter my workers but chased the priests away. Go to the source. I got the cheat codes and brought a tank to my side of the river.  Of course, he'll say he wants dialogue, peace, understanding for nations while giving people phone calls that make them jump out of three story buildings and killing disabled people over $40 dollars a month (Tatu Invalidy).  yeah, you're really protecting them, Putin. The guy on the wheel chair got attention and now Putin suddenly cares about disabled people.  Fuck you, Putin.  The only good thing you're good for is fucking.

We need real leaders and a supercomputer at the UN.

Brief Chat by an Amateur

Putin: Welcome to Russia, land of the free and faithful to God.  We have beautiful country.
Guest: Who are those guys behind me?
Putin: They are your friends with AK47.  They are good friends, yes, agree?
Guest: um, sure, um, okay. Why are all your women on your webpage nearly naked?
Putin: You no like Russian women? very attractive. We have beautiful country and women. Wide and long.  Always happy in Russia.
The men with AK47s get closer.
Guest: Sounds great.
Putin: I did have slight problem at the office in the hotel where we met, see friend. They did not fill up vodka machine, only got water. A man cannot live on water alone.
Guest: I thought that was bread.. (looks nervous).
Putin: You no like vodka?  Vodka make a good nation.  It soul and spirit of the country.  We drink lot. You want?
Guest: I'm...
Putin: Get him some vodka, boys.
Guest: (Drinks the vodka and passes out.)
Putin: Ah, he liked cyanide, too.  Very funny, no?  Fill vodka machine.

Kaela and Putin

Putin: Oh no, retarded girl has crush on me, maybe break my wonderful marriage.  Very scared. +says prayer to God+
Kaela: Why can I think of nothing but his smile?  Hell's teeth.
Putin: We will find the terrorists, chase them down even in the bathroom.
Kaela: He ran into the bar and waved his hand in my face.  Are you kidding?  I'm not plucking my mustache this month.  I think I'll invest in some more KFC.
Putin: Spy no kidding, spy save marriage.
Kaela: Whatever.