She had stuff going on as well, but it didn't bother her. She functioned still as I whined (still do). I know. She told me to get over it.
I should have.
It's been over six years, not that time means anything to a schizophrenic. Very little has meaning in my shell of a person. I'm not the old Kaela I used to be. She died.
I have deconstructed many of my thoughts, and the horrible things they stood for in reality. It's a shame. It's embarrassing. When you're schizophrenic, a lot of odd cognitive things occur. You think things that you don't want to think, and your thought process runs wild, but you'll still use the same line of thought, even though it's faulty.
I fight through the cobwebs of evil intents. I fight my internal feed as well.
Another aspect that's annoying about schizophrenia is that you hear voices that are wrong. Let me stress that again: WRONG. Sometimes, I want to side with them, want to believe them, but 99.9% of the time, they are bad. I used to consult them for advice, which led me to self-delusion.
Apparently, Campbell made her other roommate crazy. I don't know why they blamed her. It's like when they went after my superiors. It's like... Well, I have a brain problem. I'm working on it. I still can't control everything.
Campbell just has a lot of strength. I think it intimidates others.
This was funny though. They went straight for it.
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