I'm Not Playing Games

You force me on too much medicine, and I'll stop eating. I've been fairly compliant.

I've never killed anyone and my grandma lied about the clawing thing. Hey, I'm white trash with no redeeming qualities. Threaten an animal and see what happens. I was still in dizzy, disoriented land when that happened. I wasn't well, and it wsan't schizophrenia. That would be from the cyanide. Nobody wants to defend or help me or prove what really happened.

No, you should never claw your grandma, but she wouldn't let go of me, and I had to get away. I put slight pressure on her. She doesn't have any proof that I did more than that, no photos. The police didn't take her to the hospital. I've never done anything else, much as I'm accused. I sent a mean letter in HS to some girl (catfight), Campbell (or get the fuck away from me) and that's been about as vicious as I've been. Self-defense.

I've got the IQ of a wounded rat these days. I don't think I'm a threat to public safety. Thanks psychotronic warfare for preventing me from being a terrorist. I told him why I got angry, and he ignored me as usual. He's trying to box me now into unsafe doses.

It's me, my behavior, and I don't see any behavioral therapy attempts.

If you drug an elephant, will he learn calculus or will he just sit there and stare? Why not just kill me? I'll be easy to handle then. At least work for your money.

It's difficult for me to be sassy these days since I'm floating around. that's why I like to pump those emotions. I can feel something. A pulse of something. I don't think they can hear me on the moon. Scream louder.

Personally, I don't think I can handle civilization, so I'd like them to open camps and invite me. Fair warning, I become a puke monster at night. I get really disoriented and cannot remember simple instructions though, so be nice. I can write because I can collect myself, and I do most things automatically.

I had no history of hypochondria, and I'd like to tell the ER people that. I know you didn't have time for me, but I thought I was dying. I was smelling rotting flesh and my head hollowed out and I flipped out because I couldn't stop throwing up, and they said I was sticking my finger down my throat. I'm going to puke by the camera next time and sue you. Excuse me for caring once. I'm into self-preservation. Not that any doctor will listen to me, so fuck you all. You are wrong all the time. I'd never been to a hospital during my middle child and teenage years. I'd been in one for tubes and that was it. The first time was in 2009. There's something wrong with me. We're going to take some cognitive tests, and I'm going to show you that it's not family friendly in here. What's beautiful is that it affects everything, and I cannot escape it. I had a headache for 8 months and when the headache went away, I was dizzy and like really stupid but the pressure went away. I've improved since then but I still have issues. I'm no longer smelling odd things, but I still puke. I freak out because I get disoriented, and I can't feel my normal emotions to a degree that i have no instincts. There was nothing worse than that headache. It was in the morning, in noon and at night. No one would "believe" me. Look at my medical recorders. Look at when I've been in. I did have one "tantrum" when I screamed at Putin while they were still trying to kill me with the damn ray, and I used my name. I still had the headache then but I was determined to be angry because why does everyone feel like they own my life?

Did you believe my blood shot eyes? It's cool. I don't need to give you my money or "your' money since that's how most of you feel. take it, you worthless pieces of shit. I know I am, and i'd love to go somewhere productive where I don't sin. I'm a sinner. I HATE FREEDOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Labor camps.

Who wants a diagnosis of schizophrenia? Come on, it's fun.